WHO EVEN AM I? This task certainly brought me to the verge of an existential crisis but I feel I got there in the end. I sat in my new home with my camera in hand looking around the room desperate for inspiration. I started to realise how little I knew about this place…this city, this house, this degree I’m doing, this new daily routine I’ve begun… Everything that came to mind when I thought about the things that make up who I am, were strangely all things of the past or out of reach…I like football?…I cant even remember the last time I played…I play drums?…No more band and my kits in a shed in Brisbane…cooking? Well I’m too broke to cook anything that isn’t homebrand…Fishing?… never have the time… Love a pint? again...broke.

 I think the present me is starting fresh, is open to what the future holds, is a little freaked out…so I started to think of ways capturing that. This is what I came up with.

TEXT

Do you remember him?

No

Pretty sure you do.

Pretty sure I don’t.

What’s he look like?

You know…blond hair, tallish.

Hmmm nah

You do!

How olds he?

20 I think

The guy from Brisbane?

yeah that guy

Jack

Yeah Jack

What about him?

AUDIO

This is a recording of my housemates playing a cardgame. I like the idea of capturing conversation without context… Doing this made me thing of a line in the book Shantaram “Personality and personal identity are in some ways like co-ordinates on the street map drawn by our intersecting relationships. We know who we are and we define what we are by references to the people we love and reasons for loving them.”

https://soundcloud.com/jack-connor-3/self-portrait-audio-1

https://soundcloud.com/jack-connor-3/self-portrait-audio-2

This Audio track is of me zipping up my backpack and throwing it in the cupboard…Representing the end and beginning of a new chapter.

See next blog post for Photos and Videos…

Heres a documentary I made a couple of years back on Robin Bailey, the well known breakfast radio presenter for 97.3fm in Brisbane.

Looking forward to improving my production skills and working on new projects this year…

https://youtu.be/Zn7BwwevzkE

Threw around some ideas for my self portrait at home the other day…

I couldn’t help myself and went against the constraints. Editing a few clips together definitely helped me get some ideas though. Have a look!

https://youtu.be/526bjaZplJg

The short snippets of footage all serve as meaning to who I am and what’s happening in my life.

• My housemate playing keyboard

I decided that firstly music whether it be making or listening to it is something hugely associated with my life. I thought it was necessary to have a sound track to this video as predominately the sound of an instrument of some kind fills the house continuously.

• The stove
• Eating delicious meal 
• Letterbox
• Pot of rice
• Washing on line

I included these four shots as I felt they symbolise just a few of many things that I have strangely missed whilst not having a home for so long and that fact that I am slowly readjusting to having these things back in my life.

• Bicycle
• Writing

These shots represent starting a new Uni and being in a new city. Getting back into study and also exploring unfamiliar Melbourne on my bike.

• Broken banister
• Lease sign
• House
• Sawing wood

The shots of the state of the house and me building my bed out of crates, not only  symbolises my financial situation but also represents my need to rebuild, refocus and the importance that at this point in my life I need to be driven and devoted, not to break apart but to be the best, most productive version of myself.

https://youtu.be/zD3zPPnT8Rg

Most importantly I noticed that media is everywhere, you can’t escape it. You look around a corner, down an alleyway and there it is…Media… staring straight at you. But in all seriousness it is highly interesting the way almost everything we do is an influence of the media in some way. What we wear, what we eat, everything that we buy has medias mark all over it… as I walked around federation square I’m sure media has seeped into my subconscious leading me to make certain decisions in the future. It is important to recognize this subconscious consumption of media and to question why that piece of media is there and this piece is over here…I had a good day.

“The Media are not so much ‘things’ as places which most of us inhabit, which weave in and out of our lives. Their constant messages and pleasures seem to flow around and through us, and we immerse most of our waking lives” Branston and Stafford, 2010, the media students book, 5^th ed.

Another interesting lecture today. We moved very quickly from one topic to another, which is sort of what I’m about to do in this post… I liked the way Brian used his hands to explain how we have Media over here (left) and reality over here (right) I had no idea what he meant by this but I slowly got there in the end. He used examples of visiting London and seeing Big Ben only to realise its much smaller and how the media can’t really depict the reality of experience. He also mentioned how its not necessarily true when saying the individual has been opened up to all this choice in relation to the reading we were given. I felt that William Merrin focused on how we the consumers of media have more choice and power than ever before, power to be our own editors and publishers, to distribute and consume what we want. But Brian briefly asked the question is it real choice? Its sort of like saying, you can have any colour you want as long as its black. Definitely sparked some interest into how media can constrain and channel us in obvious way but also in very subtle ways. A couple of great Japanese examples appeared, seeing as they are at the forefront of such mediated saturation…a bit like stepping inside a television or into a YouTube cat clip.

We then lifted the needle to hear the sound of silence or is there such a thing?

John Cage who is best known for his 1952 composition 4:33, in which a musician came out on stage, sat at the piano and did absolutely nothing aside from being present for the duration specified by the title. It wasn’t however “four minutes and 33 seconds of silence,” as it is sometimes assumed, but rather the sounds of the environment heard by the audience during the performance. We reenacted our own composition of silence but for only 33 seconds. In that time I began to notice that the atmospheric noise became louder. I could hear the air conditioning, squeaking of chairs, coughing. The sound of my anxieties started to take over. My perceptual apparatus, both physical and emotional was registering the dramatic change and I began to start asking myself questions…Why am I sitting here? I’ve got to fill out that centrelink form, I hope I’m not the only one with my eyes closed. For another four minutes people would be squirming in their seats!

Being inspired by John Cage’s performance we took the streets to intentionally notice everything related to media communication!

See my next blog post.

Looking forward to getting started on my self-portrait, I already have many ideas. It was a good feeling walking out of the tute with a much better understanding of how to use this blog now. I have zero blogging experience so I’m figuring it out as I go. I know I’ll be looking back on these first few posts and laughing at how inexperienced I was.

Had a chat to my housemates to brainstorm some ideas on creative ways to present myself and the current events that are happening in my life (new city, new house, new Uni etc.) Its going to be tough not to get too technical. I’m all about producing a fancy polished edit to cover up the fact that my content or story isn’t the best. This time its all about doing things raw and quick, dirty aesthetics is okay so I’ll be definitely be operating in a different way…refinement is not important we were told. I hope I can pull something unique off.

1 To be at the forefront of technology in terms of making media.

2 Be able to speak better publicly

3 Have to the ability to help people and do something of value with my new set of skills

4 Overthrow our media warlords

5 Be better at Editing

6 Produce a great documentary

7 Give disadvantaged people a voice

8 Make new friends

9 Write professionally

10 Be proud of all my achievements

Some really exiting things mentioned in the lectorial… I think I’m going to really enjoy this new way of learning. It’s as if we will be alternating between the type of deep focus that’s required when game of thrones is on…the blinds are shut, laptops are closed and the phones stuffed down the side of the couch. As well as activities that require rapid switching of focus among different tasks, a bit like watching Q&A while reading the tweets below. I’m more towards those with hyper attention as its definitely a change to my school days of staring out the class window while the teacher hands out worksheets, sits at the front and demands no one talks. The course sounds like it’s going to be really engaging, enjoyable and the most efficient and productive way to get things done!